Travel-Snack

Laughing seemed to take the edge off... or perhaps I was starting to feel the alcohol's effect. It didn't matter, my mind was at ease for the first time in hours, maybe even days. As a bonus, I started noticing more of my surroundings, including the incessant humming from across the bar. I searched for the source, and found two women talking... loudly. Now that I had noticed it, it was impossible to ignore, and though I knew it wasn't possible, they seemed to be getting louder. The worst part was that they weren't talking about anything of consequence, just mindless chatter and gossip, which made their noise pratically unbearable.

My suited friend was busy writing on a notebook, and looked as thought he didn't want to be disturbed, so I obliged and remained silent.

Trying to distract myself wasn't working, and my newfound good mood was in serious jeopardy.

Several deep, long breaths, eyes closed... the smell of the ocean, the continuous sound of waves crashing on the sand... I let it wash over me, and soon forgot about the women.

I took a sip, savouring the liquid longer than usual.

"Sorry about that. I always carry this notebook around. This way if I have any ideas I can write them down right away. No memorization required."

The suit had put his notebook away in his briefcase and raised his glass to me, which I met with my own in a toast.

"How many times have you made this trip?"
"Uh... this is my fifth time if memory serves"
"And you're still sane?"
He smiled, but the gesture didn't extend to his eyes.

"Well... after the first trip I knew I had to protect my mind, so now I have pretty strong mental barriers... not strong enough to completely block out those women's pain, but enough to keep some ounce of sanity." He shuddered and reached for the glass. "Drinking, despite its negative aftermath, also helps."

"Well, one time is enough. I'm never getting on this train again."
"Good! I don't think you can handle another train ride."
"What do you mean?"

"Well, I think I have to inform you you've been acting like an unstable, even crazy person."
My face must've expressed an unspoken question because he continued talking, answering.

"I've been in your car for a while now. And no, I don't think you noticed me, you're attention was always focused elsewhere, like the ones who wear hoods. And despite your best efforts, you have a lot of unsolved issues. They're starting to affect your judgment and you aren't aware of it."

"Ok... I'll give you that, but I don't think I've been acting that crazy."
"No? Let me put it this way: you have a lot of emotional baggage and most of what you've seen on the train is overwhelming... yet you act like everything is normal. Sure, you were affected by the sacrifice, but other than that..."

"You're saying I'm losing control over myself."

"And I think that you won't be able to regain that control until those issues you're carrying around are resolved."

I avoided his eyes, staring at my half-empty glass.
I knew he was right, but didn't have it in me to deal with them at the moment. So I did the only thing that seemed to help at the moment, I took another sip and continued staring at the glass.

The shade were I stood was provided by foliage from a palmtree. That was the material of which the round bar's roof was made of,and so, the sun could still reach me through the gaps. One of these was directly over my glass, and sunlight reflected light on every bead of cold water crawling down its surface.

"Don't worry." The suit was talking again."You're not alone in your problems. If you need help..." He gulped down the rest of his beer." You need only ask."

He shook my hand and started walking away, towards the sea.